How to Cope With Sleep Deprivation After Baby Arrives

The arrival of a newborn is a joyous occasion, but it often comes hand-in-hand with a significant disruption to sleep patterns, which can feel particularly overwhelming for new parents.

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The unpredictable nature of newborn sleep patterns can leave even the most prepared mummies feeling overwhelmed and perpetually sleep-deprived. 

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So, how do you deal with your sleep deprivation after having a baby? 

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How to Help Your Baby Sleep Better 

The good news is that while the initial sleep disruption is inevitable, it doesn't have to be a period of constant suffering.

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Here’s how you can help your bub sleep better so you can cope with sleep deprivation.

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1. Sleep When Baby Sleeps 

While seemingly simplistic, this advice holds a core truth. Whenever your baby is napping, try to rest as well, even if it's just for 20-30 minutes. Don't feel pressured to be productive during baby’s naptime. 

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However, let’s be realistic – sometimes you'll need to settle household chores, shower, eat, or handle other essential tasks. Aim for at least one nap a day. 

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On the flip side, ensure your baby has stimulating activities like playing and interacting with you during their awake periods. This can help them expend energy and be more tired for their naps and nighttime sleep.

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2. Develop a Routine for Baby

Next, help your baby understand sleep cues by developing regular nap and bedtime routines. This could involve calming activities like a warm bath, feeding, reading, or singing lullabies before bed. 

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Aim to put your baby to bed when they are drowsy but still awake. This practice can help them learn to self-soothe and fall asleep independently, without needing to be rocked or held. If your bubba fusses, pause for a few minutes to observe if they can settle back to sleep on their own before immediately responding to your baby's fussing.

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Swaddling can also help them have a better sleep. If you choose to swaddle, always place your baby on their back to sleep. Ensure you put your baby down to sleep after swaddling. Discontinue swaddling once your baby shows signs of being able to roll over as mobility with a swaddle can create a suffocation or strangulation risk if the blanket comes loose. 

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Using a sleep log to track your baby's sleep can help you identify patterns and establish consistent wake and sleep times.

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However, keep in mind that periods of frequent feeding, or cluster feeding, are common during growth spurts and can temporarily alter established routines. It's a normal part of development, and things will generally become more predictable as your baby matures.

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How to Help Yourself Sleep Better

Here are some simple solutions to help you and your partner sleep better when you get the chance so you can better deal with sleep deprivation after baby arrives.

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1. Create a Conducive Sleep Environment for Yourself

Even if it's just for a few minutes before your anticipated short sleep window, try to wind down with a warm bath, gentle stretching, or reading.

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Also, ensure you have a conducive sleep environment. For instance, the bedroom should be dark, quiet, and cool. Invest in comfortable bedding and blackout curtains. Use earplugs or a white noise machine to block out disruptive sounds.

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Try to also streamline nighttime routines at night. Have everything you need for feedings and diaper changes readily accessible by the bedside. Consider using a dim nightlight to avoid fully waking yourself and the baby.

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2. Practise Good Sleep Hygiene

Most of us are guilty of these habits even before the baby arrives. However, maintaining good sleep hygiene habits can improve the quality of the rest you get, especially when you’re only getting fragmented sleep. 

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Some habits to consider include:

• Avoid caffeine and alcohol before bed: These substances can interfere with sleep.
• Limit screen time before bed: The blue light emitted from electronic devices can suppress melatonin production, making it harder to fall asleep.  
• Maintain a regular sleep schedule (as much as possible): Even on weekends, try to go to bed and wake up around the same time to regulate your body's natural sleep-wake cycle.

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3. Postnatal Classes

Postnatal classes are invaluable for new mummies navigating baby sleep schedules. They offer crucial insights into infant sleep development, explaining why newborns sleep differently and setting realistic expectations. 

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You'll learn practical strategies for establishing calming bedtime routines and creating a conducive sleep environment. 

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Postnatal classes also teach you to understand your baby's cues, differentiating tiredness from other needs and promoting independent sleep skills.

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4. Seek Support

Lastly, don't hesitate to reach out for help when you need it.

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Openly communicate your feelings and needs with your partner. Remember you’re a team, so work together to find solutions. Consider reaching out to your family and friends as well and don't be afraid to ask for specific assistance. Sharing experiences and tips with other daddies and mummies going through the same thing can also be incredibly helpful and validating.

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Don’t have anyone to turn to? Consider hiring external help if your budget allows. A nanny from NewBubs Confinement can work wonders. These professionals provide invaluable support with nighttime care, allowing you to get more rest. Find out more on how a confinement nanny can transform your newborn’s care experience.  

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If you are experiencing persistent fatigue, mood changes, or other concerning symptoms, speak to your doctor. They can rule out any underlying medical conditions and offer guidance and support.

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Consequences of Sleep Deprivation 

Chronic sleep deprivation can have significant and wide-ranging consequences for new parents, impacting their physical, emotional, and cognitive well-being, as well as their ability to care for their baby.  

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This isn't just a matter of feeling a little tired; it can lead to a cascade of issues, including:

• Emotional strain: Increased irritability, anxiety, and even postpartum depression are more common when sleep is severely lacking.  
• Cognitive impairment: Difficulty concentrating, memory lapses, and impaired decision-making can affect daily functioning.  
• Physical exhaustion: Constant fatigue can weaken the immune system, making new mothers more susceptible to illness.
• Relationship stress: Sleep deprivation can strain relationships with partners, as both individuals struggle to cope with the demands of parenthood.  
• Physical health: Lack of sleep weakens the immune system, making parents more susceptible to illness. It can also slow down postpartum recovery, increase pain sensitivity, and contribute to fatigue, headaches, and digestive issues.  
• Emotional well-being: Sleep deprivation is strongly linked to increased irritability, mood swings, anxiety, and even postpartum depression. The constant fatigue can make it harder to cope with stress and regulate emotions.  
• Cognitive function: Insufficient sleep impairs cognitive functions such as attention span, concentration, memory, and decision-making. This can affect the ability to perform even simple tasks and potentially compromise safety.  
• Parent-infant bonding: Fatigue and irritability can make it challenging for parents to be fully present and responsive to their baby's needs, potentially affecting the development of a secure attachment.
• Relationship strain: Sleep deprivation can put a significant strain on the relationship between partners, leading to increased arguments, resentment, and a lack of intimacy.  
• Increased risk of accidents: Drowsiness and impaired cognitive function can increase the risk of accidents, such as dropping the baby or making mistakes while driving.

Causes of Sleep Deprivation for Parents

Wondering what are the causes of your sleep deprivation? Below are some common reasons so you can learn how to cope after having a baby.

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1. Frequent Feeding Schedules

Newborns have tiny stomachs and require frequent feeding, often every two to three hours around the clock, especially in the early weeks. 

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Whether breastfeeding or formula-feeding, these nighttime awakenings are non-negotiable and significantly fragment sleep. Understand that this time too shall pass in 2-3 months.

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2. Diaper Changes

While less frequent than feedings, nighttime diaper changes are essential for hygiene and comfort, further interrupting precious sleep cycles. 

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A wet or soiled diaper can cause significant discomfort and irritation, leading to fussiness, crying, and a complete disruption of those precious, albeit short, sleep cycles for both baby and parent. 

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3. Baby's Unpredictable Sleep Patterns

Newborns don't adhere to a day-night cycle initially. Their sleep patterns are often erratic, with short bursts of sleep at various times, making it difficult for parents to establish a consistent sleep routine for themselves.

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4. Hormonal Shifts

The rapid hormonal shifts after childbirth, particularly the sharp drop in estrogen and progesterone, significantly disrupt mothers' sleep. Lower estrogen can lead to lighter, fragmented sleep and even menopause-like symptoms like night sweats. The decrease in calming progesterone makes it harder to fall asleep and alters sleep stages. 

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This hormonal imbalance can destabilise the body's sleep-wake cycle, making quality rest a physiological challenge for new mothers, even when opportunities arise.

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5. Anxiety & Worry

The immense responsibility of caring for a newborn can lead to anxiety and worry, making it difficult to relax and fall asleep even when the baby is resting. Concerns about the baby's well-being, feeding, and development can keep parents awake.  

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6. Physical Discomfort

Postpartum recovery, especially after a vaginal birth or C-section, can involve physical discomfort and pain, making it challenging to find a comfortable sleeping position.  

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After a vaginal birth, perineal tears or episiotomy incisions can cause soreness, swelling, and pain, making it uncomfortable to lie on the back or sides. Similarly, hemorrhoids, a common postpartum issue, can add to the discomfort and make finding a comfortable posture elusive. 

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For mothers who have undergone a C-section, the abdominal incision site can be tender and painful, limiting movement and making it difficult to roll over or lie flat. 

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The internal healing process, involving uterine contractions as the uterus returns to its pre-pregnancy size, can also contribute to cramping and discomfort that interferes with sleep.

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7. Partner Dynamics

Unequal distribution of nighttime duties or a lack of communication and support between partners can exacerbate sleep deprivation for the primary caregiver.

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Good Night, Sleep Tight

The blissful image of a peacefully slumbering baby often clashes with the reality of frequent night feeds, diaper changes, and the sheer unpredictability of a tiny human adjusting to life outside the womb. 

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Hopefully, the above practical tips can allow bub to sleep well and help new parents better cope with sleep deprivation after having a baby.

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